Things are going okay?

My efforts to cut down on my aspartame are going well. I'm also increasing my weight-loss efforts because I want to lose a few pounds by Saturday. I know how ridiculous that sounds, a failure like me. I guess having a deadline helps, because that's going well too.

Though I'm bloated and my weight is all over the place anyway - point is, I'm feeling in control.

So for cutting down on aspartame - I'm trying to get my caffeine from coffee and when I just want something with flavor, I go for a slenderize Fuze drink, which is only 5-15 calories per serving depending on the flavor. As for coffee, I really only like the sugary chocolate abominations, but I also learned something.

When you drink sugary pops and coffees, you crave fewer carbs.

So one sugary coffee drink could save me a bigger mistake later.

I also have caffeine pills, but the dose is really high (200mg) and I should save those for when I really need them.

By the way, yesterday was my last day of classes for the semester.

My entire academic life is wrapped up in the next couple weeks.

A paper due friday

Followed by two exams next week.

Then? Done. Fin.

I do need to study, for both of these classes. I have a lot of work to do on that paper.

I'm going to go to the gym this week, though, I'm determined. No excuses, it won't be crowded. I never use the gym - and the thing is, it's a really nice gym. Clean, big, bright - nice equipment. A major university facility I have at my disposal and don't use. Shame shame on me.

Oh, damnit.

I jokingly asked someone to hit me in the arm and rolled up my sleeve.

He was carrying a stick and it looked like a weapon, I know him enough to joke like that - though not very well.

Marks. A rash or something, actually. Now I think spider bites :/ which is creepy.

Apparently it looks like cigarette burns so now he thinks I'm a masochist.

Given the context... hrm. Damnit.

Embarrassing.

One thing I need to work on is how spazzy I act when I'm embarrassed. Sometimes I talk to myself, sometimes I hyperactively try to be cute or some nonsense. Whatever I do, it just makes me look more unbalanced.

I owe you guys a thinspo post, in a day or two I'll make one.