Friday, October 28, 2011

A month?!

I knew I wasn't writing much, but to see it's been over a month since my last post maddens me. I guess I've been fairly busy. I'm not sure with what... but apparently busy enough to lose track of time.

This week has been particularly stressful. Lots of tests.

I've been reading a book lately. A couple really, for classes - but one in particular which I find the most engaging. Reviving Ophelia by Mary Pipher.

I actually kind of disagree with some of it. I won't go into too many details because I already talked about some of this with people I know and I'm paranoid, but one thing that stands out to me is that she said that androgynous people were the most well adjusted. I assume she didn't mean to any extreme degree. Just people who aren't terribly attached to their gender roles and do as they like rather than what's expected of them.

At first I disagreed. It's normal to want to be girly! I *want* to be girly. I never got to be girly as a younger adolescent because of the fact that I was a giant deformed monster creature stomping though the halls and there was no point in dressing myself up, because then I'd just be a pig wearing a dress.

I wasn't a well adjusted girl...

Anyway. I realized that I've always valued my femininity. I was the little girl my mother wanted. I wanted to be a ballerina when I was four, five, six, howevermany years. I loved frilly dresses and short skirts when I thought I didn't look like a [hideously pockmarked] pig in a dress. I started to experiment with makeup before middle school. I just stopped at pubery because I stopped thinking I was pretty enough to adorn.

Now that I'm less heinous to look at, I have started caring about how I look again. I have long hair (extremely), I'm obsessed with my figure (well...something), and I'm extremely interested in everything that can cover my many flaws.

Am I well adjusted?

You know what blog you're reading. You know what this is about.

Speaking of, there's apples in my house :) Yay! It also helps me eat less at home because after I have an apple, my mouth feels clean and I'm somewhat filled up. Nothing is appealing after eating an apple.

Didn't I write about them before? I looked, but I can't find them. I have lots of useful posts though! I almost forgot. I intended to compile a list of the better ones at some point and link them somewhere more permanently.

I still don't feel motivated enough to do so. It would take the slightest bit of momentum. *paws helplessly at the computer monitor for some reason*

Ooh! I left "Chobits" up in another window!

"Chiiiii?"