Friday, May 28, 2010

Lane Bryant Mocks Victoria's Secret


*Edit note: I they removed the ad from their blog, but read about the madness it was!

Article here

^ I copied it below, but the original page contains lots of worth-while links, so please check it out.

"Oh, snap!

Looks like Lane Bryant is still feeling a tad touchy about last month's lingerie ad drama, in which the plus-size retailer accused Fox and ABC of a double standard for running a racy Victoria's Secret commercial while allegedly censoring a Lane Bryant ad starring a curvy model.

The company's Inside Curve blog has stirred the pot by posting a video featuring a lingerie-clad skeleton who smooches her reflection in the mirror as she raves about her "perfect bra made for perfect women, like me" -- which is "not for chubbies," MediaPost reports.


A Lane Bryant spokesperson tells StyleList that the brand did not create the ad, but posted it in response to the ongoing body image debate.

"Millions of supporters have expressed their views in a variety of ways and following is a poignant, albeit humorous work, that speaks to the cause of accepting beauty in all sizes," according to the Inside Curve.

We feel a mud wrestling contest coming on. But while the ad is lighthearted, it's not really Victoria's Secret's fault that TV networks took issue with the Lane Bryant ad. And we're sure Lane Bryant wouldn't take too kindly to a parody mocking their curvaceous models.

We've said it before and we'll say it again... it's about embracing all body types -- no bones about it."

While it's completely outrageous that ABC would show a VS ad over Lane Byant, this retaliation seems to reflect more on a skinny bigotry than anger towards the the injustice they suffered.

The quote about accepting all body types being the point of the ad is particularly hypocritical.

I'm taken aback by how rude and hypocritical this is.

Clearly there's some one to hate you no matter where you're sitting on the bmi chart.

Pot calling the Kettle black sort of thing.

I do believe that in a perfect world everyone would be their healthy size and that everyone would accept one another.

There would be No eating disorders or high quantities of unhealthy temptations EVERYWHERE.
People would understand their appetites, cravings, and motivations for eating.

In this perfect healthy world more people would lose weight than gain, but I don't want to nit pick.

There's so much wrong with the world when there's a battle between body types.

I was talking with my boyfriend and we were discussing why, in his opinion, "evolution is stupid."
Not the theory, we're not talking about the past. We're talking about the future, and how we've created a society where food is readily available, but it's our evolutionary tendency to seek out fatty foods. Our evolutionary urges are making us fatasses.

If we don't think about these things, we'll eat ourselves into an early grave.

It's so damn hard to be healthy. If you're not fighting, you're submitting.

Other countries aren't so awful - I once read something about a Russian man who lived in the US for a while - says everything tasted like chemicals and when he moved back to Russia he lost 15 pounds on food that tasted better anyway.

Apparently there are no fat people in Russia
^I could have sworn I posted this before...but either google removed it or I was thinking of a forum. But yeah, all of those girls look healthy and beautiful.

My boyfriend once downloaded Russian fat porn, I think I told him to. The girls weren't even that fat, probably like bmi of 24,

So yeah.

We lived in this warped little bubble where it's like a crucible of unnatural and unhealthy conditions which cause us to act out and become obsessed with the weirdest things.

I honestly believe society has driven us all completely insane, at least in this regard.

Let's all leave the country. I could live in Russia some day, hey - I'm already used to Buffalo winters.

Friday, May 21, 2010

Thanks, my little black dress, and salt.

It's a couple days later, and I'm feeling a lot better. My dad doesn't really stay mad, even though he gets mad so easily. Also, the sh*tbag is in jail for the time being, for hitting it's girlfriend. So two problems seem dormant for the time being.

I really appreciate the responses I got to my last post. You girls are awesome. And I do need a job. I guess I've got a million excuses. Mainly social anxiety and transportation.

I went to the mall with my boyfriend today, too - and I discovered Forever21. I had no idea they were so cheap, from the outside they look pricey! But they're full of really cute, affordable things. So I have new favorite store. I bought my new favorite dress there, only $12.80. Oh, I found it online, you can see it
HERE The model is thinner than me, but at the same time I think it looks better on me...How often do I get to say that?

I don't know if I could shop anywhere else, now. lol.

And mall exercise is pretty amazing, too. We didn't stay long, though.

I think I figured out why I've been snacking so much. I think it's a salt craving, because I drink so much water all at once in a day - my electrolytes are out of wack or something. I ended up eating a ton of popcorn and snack mix the other day, and when I got home, it was the first night in a while I had none of the usual urge to binge. A failure led to a discovery.

So all I need to do is consume more salt to avoid consuming so much junk.

Maruchan instant lunches here I come! haha

Cravings are an irritating thing, aren't they? Not being able to identify them makes binges happen.

Tonight I'm doing pretty well.
I know my body just a little better.

<3 I love you girls!

I promise to work on my situation. Now that I don't have to worry about school for a while, I have no excuse not to.

Wednesday, May 19, 2010

Language warning.

I just had a massive fight with my dad.

Basically I was threatened and insulted.

I was called an ignorant cunt.

I was called a stupid twat.

I was called a lot of other things I don't remember.

He's an absolute asshole. The worst person I've ever known, next to my mother.

I told him to wash his hands when he got back, before he touched the dogs. He and my mother were going to court to sit and listen to the hideous repulsive shitbeast, which I've mentioned before and don't really want to get into again. It's not a person, just a fat disgusting piece of shit with an alcohol problem. No person could be so repulsive and stupid.

My dad was in a pissy mood because of the shitbeast, but turned all that rage onto me for reminding him to wash his hands.

Came right up to my face, and threatened that he would hit me if I opened my mouth again. Tried to stare me down, with this awful glare that I've become rather accustomed to over the years. I didn't say anything, but I stared back for a long time. I almost knew he was going to do it anyway. He didn't, but he wanted to. Just to get it out.

The ironic thing is that the shitbeast is in court for hitting it's "girlfriend."

So this assault case would be an interesting addition to that.

He wanted to hit me. I could see it in his eyes. His rage was immeasurable.

I know he wasn't mad at me, he was just taking his rage out on me. The thing is he's just to much of a stubborn asshole to realize that, so he's going to come home and act like more of an asshole.

I have a big day ahead of me, actually. I have an event today. It's after 8 in the morning and I haven't been to bed yet.

I know what my dad was trying to do. He was trying to make me cry. He's a horrible asshole, he doesn't think he's "gotten it through my thick skull" until he's made me cry.

Maybe he interprets my crying as remorse, rather than fear. Maybe he just likes the fear.

I've noticed over the years that he screams until he makes me cry. He started hitting me as a kid to make me cry. He's a terrible person when he gets like this. He says horrible things.

One little quip I'd like to throw out there, is that immediately after calling me an ignorant twat, he said he was the only one in the house who showed any respect.

WOW. I called him out on that one. He didn't like that.

He deserves to be cut down to size. I could, if I were willing to press charges.

The thing is, I don't think I actually have the courage to take him to court. What am I supposed to do, anyways? I don't like the police. I don't want to go to court. He's bipolar or something anyway, a day or two later he's pretending nothing ever happened. I don't want to speak to a lawyer, or to police. They're scary and intimidating.

HE IS NOT MY GUARDIAN ANYMORE. I certainly don't respect him.

The only reason I'm here is because I'm poor, and because I don't want the shitbeast moving back in with my animals.

BOTH of my parents lie to me all the time. When my dad doesn't want to lie, he starts in with the name calling and anger, with pretending he's got some authority that makes what he's doing okay.

I guess I'm not making sense out of context anymore. I don't want to explain the entire context, though.
All you need to know is that the shitbeast is violent, has tried to kill me, drinks, and is filthy. So damn filthy. Plague filthy. Vile, repulsive, vomit-inducing. I had to see it the other day - it was awful. So fucking fat, and it's hair made me want to puke.

So yeah.

Oh, and I never mentioned my mother smacked me in the face the other day.

I don't even know anymore.

I feel so fucking abused, and weak, and I hate it. I want to fight it, but I just keep getting beaten back down with lies and treachery and violence.

I'm SICK of this shit, and I need to get out of it.

I'm sorry if I'm not making sense, I'm sorry if this seems vague, or if it seems dramatic. I just can't get all the details out.

But I'm *really* upset right now. I'm just glad I didn't cry in front of my ASSHOLE father.

Probably WOULD have hit me if he didn't have somewhere to be. I hope he acts like that if he has to be a witness.

Anorexia Mirabilis: Fasting in Victorian England and Modern India

Sharing an article my boyfriend found on reddit.

Anorexia Mirabilis: Fasting in Victorian England and Modern India

Joan Jacob Brumberg’s fantastic book, Fasting Girls: The History of Anorexia Nervosa, is an excellent example of the benefits of sociologically-inspired history. Brumberg begins by explaining that girls who starved themselves have been recorded in many historical epochs, but the way in which societies have made sense of that starvation has varied.

Today we medicalize self-starvation; we call it a mental illness and we name it “anorexia nervosa.”

In Medieval Europe, fasting girls were labeled with the term “anorexia mirabilis”; these girls were seen as miracles, able to survive on spiritual devotion alone. (Later, some would suggest that these women were possessed by demons.) During the Victorian Era, people would pilgrimage to these fasting girls and leave offerings. A famous fasting girl could be a financial boon to a struggling family.

During the nineteenth century, medical doctors and psychiatrists (who generally saw religion as a threat to their nascent authority) argued that the fasting girls were impossibilities, that no one could survive without food. The competition between medicine and religion became so intense that doctors became intent on proving that these fasting girls were not, in fact, surviving on holiness, but were, instead, sneaking food. In several cases, doctors staked out fasting girls, watching her to make sure that she did not eat, and these girls, relentless in the illusion, sometimes died.

In any case, I thought of Brumberg’s book when I came across a story about Prahlad Jani, an Indian man who claims that he has not had any food or drink for 70 years, surviving on “spiritual life force” instead:

Indian military scientists are reportedly holding him in a hospital, watching him not eat and drink. Unlike the doctors in the Victorian era, however, who wanted the girls to fail, these doctors think Jani might hold a secret that will be useful for the military and they’re hoping that, by watching, they will be able to discover it. Here’s to hoping he is less stubborn than Victorian girls.

Friday, May 14, 2010


I feel squishier, but the scale hasn't really changed.

Perhaps today isn't the best day to blog, because I've eaten pretty heartily and I'm pretty mad at myself. I tend to blog less when I'm failing miserably. Hence why I hardly ever blog anymore.

I also haven't been able to stop myself from gorging myself at night.

There is one positive element which has been added to my life, though - I've started taking a bicycle around places to save on bus fare and get some exercise. Actually, my boyfriend kind of forced it on me - gave me his mother's old bike. It's rusty and squeaky, but it's kind of cute anyway.

I'm sort of happy about being squishier without gaining weight. The squishier thing tends to mean I'm going to lose weight - I don't know if that makes any sense. Like maybe I've lost fat so I'm not so solid...

Anyways, I feel better since I'm getting out more.

Now that school and exams are done I should have more energy to focus on that all-too-high number.

My weight hasn't changed in ages. I really resent myself and how I've failed, though. I should be motivated. It's summer. Have I ever worn a bikini? To be fair, I can't remember the last time I went to the beach. None the less, I'm in no condition.

I think I looked really good this past summer, at my low weight, 126. I'm close to ten pounds heavier than that now. What I'd like to do is reach 123, and maintain it for a while. There's no reason I shouldn't be able to be 123lbs.

My boyfriend gets so frustrated with me if I ask him about my weight. I'm almost scared to do it because he'll get moody. Fact is whatever I say, I'm probably asking him to lie to me.

I'm awful.

I want to be small for him. I want him to be able to pick me up and let me sit on his lap. I know he's not a big guy, and he *can* pick me up... I wish it were easier though. I wish he could do it spontaneously...I wish I didn't have to fear for my life when he did it o_0

I'd lose a few pounds if I didn't eat at night. It's Dieting101, I know.

I didn't use to have this problem. I think it's been stress...


random thinspo pic stolen from: Ana Princesa

Sunday, May 9, 2010

Thinspo video

I've been slacking in my blogging. I don't even know how to follow that sentence. Of course I have no progress to show you. Maybe now that I've got a bike and free time, things will improve.


Caffeine headache.