Tuesday, December 21, 2010

Someone died last night

A 14 year old girl died last night
Her name is Andrea
She died in the hospital
She was in recovery
Her mother was in Germany at the time
Her father is dead.
Pretty sure she died of heart failure.

I know all this because she was tweeting at the time. @xAnaismybff

She blacked out, so her doctors knew she was sick again
So they put her in the hospital and told her to gain 38 pounds.
She refused
Ran away
Almost died on the streets from self-inflicted wounds.

They brought her back.
But she died. That night. Last night.

This whole thing is disturbing to me on so many levels.
Not just because a 14 year old girl died...but if that doesn't break your heart, I don't know what would.
What I also find disturbing, is that even though it does break my heart - I'm a little jealous of how thin she got.
She had a bmi of 12.3

I'm sick. I'm sick. I'm sick.

It makes me so angry that I could even think like that. If I ever doubted that I really am f*cked in the head, I know it now.

And I'm sorry, for making you read those thoughts of mine.
That was a child
and she deserved to live
She deserved to grow up and have a family and be successful at whatever she wanted.

What's more, her friend lost 4 friends to anorexia this year.

and it's only a few days to Christmas.

Let your thoughts be with her family and friends. Especially friends, really. I didn't know this girl at all, but I'm concerned for girls who may be as disordered as she was. Girls she knew from the hospital.

I know this sort of thing happens a lot.
It's still a tragedy
A serious tragedy

I don't even know what it takes to bring someone that far gone to recovery. Is it really just waiting for them to die? How do you make someone want to be well? I don't think you can, but that makes me so angry.

I'm sorry...

I'm gonna go.


  1. That's wonderful... Beautiful.I hope she is a beautiful angel, living happily in a place she feels safe and at home in.

  2. You know, young death does happen a lot: a girl I used to be friends with, age 22, died last night in a car wreck. But deaths by eating disorders are not as common around these parts. It's wild to think about a 14-year-old dying this close to Christmas, without her parents there to comfort her.

    Thanks for sharing this with us.

    You can't really make someone want to be well, but I think you CAN influence their decisions by loving them. Love has saved me many a time.

  3. just who in the fuck is this bobajeno guy
    he is a horrible human being
    i have rarely ever felt this hatred twoards a human
    he is (for anyone who hasnt yet found this poor girls mom's twitter) harrassing her mom and saying the most crude and awful things
    this makes me so sad and angry
    it makes me so sad to think about this girl and how she is a testament to the reality of this disease
    i hope she finds peace